I need an outlet

I have been going to therapy on & off since my mother died in 2001, for various reasons.

Some obvious. Others not so obvious.

I have kept a journal my entire life and when I heard about blogging I was intrigued to say the least. It seemed intimidating to publish my thoughts, but I considered the feedback I would get as ‘therapy’ if you will. I welcome the feedback good or bad. Hell my therapist tells me when I am being an ass. It’s constructive criticism.

A while back I blogged about a situation with my ex-husband and his new wife. It was one of my first posts.

I have only created one blog about a recent situation that I encountered with them and have been hesitant to write more. I do not want this blog to turn into a rant against the obvious. I am a divorced woman who doesn’t get along with her ex-husband. Go figure. I often say we did not agree or get along when we were married so why would we get along now that we are divorced. We should just agree to disagree and call it a day.

The other day I started to write a new post and found it to be another post about something that happened once again with my ex-husband and his wife. I sat down at my computer after being awake all night and at 4 am composed another ranting blog about the craziness of my divorced life. I saved it to my drafts and went about my morning never actually going back over the draft or posting it.

It is almost a week later since that day and I have little desire to add it to publish the piece. However I am left feeling as if there are things I want to say or write about that may at times reference my struggles as a divorced woman. It is just not my style to bitch and complain about my life. I am not a martyr. I am not someone who sees the glass as half empty. I do not complain endlessly about my path in life. I do know that I am where I am today for a reason. I have come to be more understanding, more tolerant, and far more grateful for all that has happened in my life. Loss births understanding of ones strength in ways that isn’t fully understood while the event is fresh. Time trite as the saying goes, heals wounds or scabs them over enough to put things into a reasonable perspective.

So I am curious as to acceptable blog posts and if ranting gets you anywhere? How many posts have you started only to let them simmer on the back burner or you dashboard never to get published? Or how many have you posted that perhaps you wish you had considered at greater length before publishing?

About mommymetamorphosis

Redeemed. Lucky wife. Crunchy. Organic Mama of 2 boys, 2 step sons, one Little Flower and are newest Little Gem. In my previous life I was a yogi, runner, artist, dreamer, believer of all things purple! Now I'm a cloth diapering fanatic, early homeschooling mama, who tends to leave the house with spit-up somewhere on my person. I have been keeping a journal since I was a kid, but I never let anyone read it... so this should be interesting!
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3 Responses to I need an outlet

  1. Brandy says:

    If it makes you feel better, do it. Sometimes it is good to just write it out and never publish. I have found that the power of “me too” is strong on the internet. when you write something from the heart, it is read and people sit there nodding along. IT is powerful. Once again, it is all up to you what you are comfortable with but I say publish it if you think it will help someone else.

  2. Misty says:

    I pretty much agree with what Brandy said.

    I’ve been really open on my blog with talking about my postpartum depression. It was something I was pretty uncomfortable with at first, particularly being from a Southern state where there’s still a HUGE stigma surrounding mental health issues, particularly women’s mental health. But since I’ve started talking about it, I’ve had at least one friend literally tell me she had the courage to see a doctor and start antidepressants because of what I wrote and that she is SO much happier now. I’ve had another friend who was struggling with baby blues (and maybe a touch of PPD) after having her 4th child who was able to open up to me when she felt like she had nowhere else to turn. And on a personal level, I’ve found a lot of people online I can relate to more because of opening up about it.

    As far as the “rant” aspect, I think it just depends what you are comfortable with. I typically focus more on my personal feelings and will occasionally share an anecdote or example from my life. I try NOT to complain about my husband or other family members on my blog because I just think that’s not healthy for ME.

    Hope this helps. I think even writing something and not publishing it can be a good thing if it helps you deal with some of your feelings.

  3. Thanks I guess I can look at the humor side of it too! Sometimes I need to be reminded not to take things too serious-especially the ex-husband! LOL If it helps someone else in the meantime that would be awesome!

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